HOT MESS: WEEK 4
DISCUSSION GUIDE
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This week Scott wrapped up our Hot Mess series by talking about dating and romantic relationships. Although this does not directly address the stage of life that all of us are in, the relational principals are universal, and can apply to marriage, family, friendships, and other close relationships in our lives.
Scott talked about the fact that most people who date, fall into one of two categories. They are either looking for someone who will fulfill them right now, or they are looking for the "right one." "Right Now" daters are consumer daters. They are looking for another person to give them what they desire. They are constantly trying to extract something from the person that they are dating. "Right One" daters are also consumers. They are looking for the person who will complete them. They are looking for "Mr. or Mrs. Right." They buy into the myth that once they find the right person, life will be perfect.
Healthy relationships are not using people for our short term needs. They are not about finding the right person. They are about being the right person. They are about striving to love like Jesus, and growing and maturing for the benefit of others.
Look up and read 1 Corinthians 13:4-11
DISCUSS
Just for fun, tell us about your most disastrous dating relationship or "crush" story.
Although our main topic has to do with romantic relationships, most of the following questions fit the context of any relationship in our lives. Keep that in mind, and don't hesitate to discuss these questions in different relational scenarios.
Have you ever been in a relationship with somebody who was looking to you for something that you could not provide?
Have you ever looked to another person for the kind of fulfillment and completeness that can only be found in Jesus?
Have you spent most of your life believing that successful romantic relationships are about "finding the right person," or about two people just making it work?
There is a myth that when a person finds "the right one," then everything will be perfect. Where does this myth come from? What effect does it have on the way we approach relationships?
In his message Scott asked, "Are you the person that you are looking for?" He pointed out that successful relationships happen when we try to BE the right one; not when we try to FIND the right one. What efforts have you made in your life, to be the kind of person who can have healthy relationships?
PRAY FOR YOUR GROUP
Pray that in all of our relationships, we will strive to "be the right one" for the people in our lives.
PRAY FOR FCC
Pray that we will apply this same idea as a church. Pray that we will be the kind of church that Jesus needs us to be for the sake of those we are trying to reach.
PRAY FOR OUR GLOBAL PARTNERS
Pray for FCC global partners, IberoAmerican Ministries, in the Middle East as they come alongside a refugee community of 125 people. IAM has been able to empower some of these men and women to start micro-businesses; pray that these businesses flourish, for peace and stability in these families' new homes, for hope as they rebuild their lives, and for ultimately each family to know and receive the love Jesus offers.